ok first off before I start saying anything, I want to say this is purely from experience.
I’m clairsentient, I’m clairvoyant, I’m pretty much a dreamwalker and I see the shape of people’s souls. The rules for spirit are YAY different from the meat world and calling something female or male most of the time is very reductionary. Angels are canonically androgynous – so why bring this up anyway?
Because someone, brought up trans people the other day
And I’m a walk-in, literally the soul piloting my body feels different on the gender spectrum
And I can suddenly relate. Deeply and intensely, not maybe to the dysphoria. But very much to the confusion. Mostly because most debates about non-binary and transgender and LGBTQIA+ never really goes to the spiritual angle of an argument.
But this is my occult blog. So I will be presenting that experience because this is my experience. I don’t even know if I’m non-binary or trans or whatever, I only know that I never really see this argument, even if it’s the most potent one I notice.
I see the shape of people’s souls.
And they are a mix of yin and yang. Let’s not use masculine or feminine, those words have too much baggage.
When I mean Yang, I mean adventurous, meaning the throw, meaning the one who wants to discover and make a statement, who wants to destroy structures, who’s like the sun, who’s like fire, who is agile and quick moving.
When I mean Yin, I mean listening, I mean catching a throw, I mean staying and nurturing, and weaving together disparate statements, something that builds, something like night, like recovery, like water, slow and understanding.
These qualities are visceral to me. Meaning when I say your soul like that I mean I feel like you are slow moving earth in dappled sunshine. That is your mix of yin or yang. Or you are like a hasty breeze born for adventure – this is your yang. I literally see or feel those sensations as I inquisit into your energetic body.
We’re not trying to be poetic. We literally. Witness you like that. Like fire, like cold blue steel, like distant air.
So you could give me a guy who would be, straight. And I’d say he’s very recluse, has a lot of yin energy.
I don’t call him feminine, because people don’t understand/easily misunderstand me when I say he has feminine energy. yeah?
When I interact with angels, Jophiel, the pronoun she fits better while seancing while he fits better for raphael even if they are both angels who would also be could with non gendered pronouns? You feel?
Cause jophiel guards aspects of reality more typically yin like beauty.
And raphael guards aspects and is depicted more typically yang like banishing spirits
I also see Him, like in my inner eye as a really big intimidating dude – so I just go yessir immediately with no question cause the dream is on fire and everything is going to war
So where am I going with this?
I see some people’s souls as more yin like or yang like. And this would typically allow for people in the gender spectrum, like literally all of it. I can’t speak for every gender identity but what I’m saying is that an internal soul-level mix of yin and yang would allow for literally any expression.
That is the definition of infinite.
And if you want me to say that yes I’ve seen women who have strong masculine male souls or men who have effeminate souls but stay men but also some men having very woman souls then yes yes and yes. Yes. Think of an iteration you saw on the spectrum there’s probably an energetic combination that could help explain that. Human society and walking is clunky that’s a given but souls are multi-faceted.
I guess that’s what I want to write about. And even if this is probably going to be not a majority experience, when I see things like “two-spirit” appearing in the bumble options I just want to go that.
I want to talk about that.
I feel like I literally I have two souls inside of me. I know that’s not what that term means indegenously but it fits me too well on a literal level.
Not the I’m a moody teenager who talks to herself type. No. I mean when I shamanic journey to my power place. There are two souls that are situated in my body space.
And. That’s my reality. And to make it even more confusing, just a month before that the pilot of my body was a spirit called M. And I was three spirit before that.
That’s why I’m a walk-in. Jeremiah took the reins for her.
M is feminine, hippie and insecure. Both Jeremiah and Z are more energetically mature than her- they glow bigger. That’s why I thought they were guides until they suggested that they were me (the vehicle, maria) and Jeremiah is this energetic Leo, more masc and likes coffee, M didn’t like coffee. And z is just super non binary, has a predominantly feminine energy but is otherwise just quiet. For the most part, I see him quiet in the corner, he is fine with him pronouns.
I have read about “multiple personality disorder” or dissociative disorder and have meditated on integration. I can tell you – THIS IS NOT THAT. I’M PRETTY SURE. For one I didn’t create the other souls during times of trauma and I can tell you the 3 of them ARE SO DISTINCT IN SPIRIT.
I literally go to the shamanic energy place right??? Meet and talk to angels of locales or people’s main guides. I _literally_ see jeremiah and z as distinct souls. I know what shattered soul fragments look like, I know what mental emotional projections look like in shamanic spaces.
That is not them. My soul is not splintering. I just have more than 1. I had three souls.
I now have two.
When I had three souls my pilot was predominantly feminine.
When I now have two souls, my pilot is okay with presenting feminine but feels much more masculine than she used to be.
I legit, channel my inner z when I need to look more girly or remember how to be more womanly. Only cause he’s so fluid. Also, thankfully jeremiah is not so attached with being perceived as a woman. He actually likes performing it.
But if i were to ask him, he’d be bi. And z would probably be pan.
So I have two souls, a bi dude, and a pan non-bi person. What’s crazy is I even feel like Z is on the ace spectrum?? Like he’s ace for everyone else but for certain people he doesn’t mind being sexual?
To top it all off
My souls are married.
All 3 of them, they’re fucking poly.
Umm, if you want “basis”. Check out mulitple soul theory by ruth rendley. She’s basically a psychic who works more or less full time with multiple soul people and helping them be at peace with that, and any karmic tie ups. (eg: the two souls are fighting! the body is depressed! One soul is trying to escape and making the body go through seizures! oh fuck!)
And honestly I’ve been thinking about this for like maybe over a year now – what does it mean to have multiple souls? And only now that i’ve switched drivers that I’m starting to question-
Oh wow what is gender on the fucking soul level?
This is the prime example of things get complicated and I don’t know. So if you were to for example believe me, what would you call me then? The average of my souls? The average of my history? Base my gender based on who’s driving the car- I mean the body?
Does it matter?
Btw Ruth has definitely showed intersoul conflict in terms of liking different people (i loved him then not: this soul loved him but the other didn’t), different careers and just biologically fighting for control. I think those are just more resonant – or present in her studies than say queer couples in a single body.
But she has given examples of couples reincarnating in bodies together. When I asked a shaman (my mentor) basically – she said it’s rare. It’s rare to this kind of people in love in one body kind of work. But That’s My Fucking Reality.
(Yes, I’ve witnessed Astral Sex between my souls – duh)
I literally see multiple incarations of M, and jeremiah, and z getting married or being a couple through out MULTIPLE, lifetimes. I can describe you what our house looked like, where the reception was. What our bed looked like and what my ethnicity was at that point of space time. I just knew – it was Jeremiah, or M or whatnot cause I freacking recognize soul blueprints and signature.
You look different – this is a different lifetime – but it’s you.
I missed you.
SOmething like that. I told you this would get personal so it did.
I can technically theorize about twins or dissociative disorder but I won’t because I have zero credentials on that. What I know is I have multiple souls, and that souls have different gender tendencies cause they’re original energies are different yin/yang wise. And that when you switch drivers, or the soul calling the shots – these will move around also! AS well as a bunch of other things, not just gender.
This is food for thought in trying to explain LGBTQIA+ experiences from a spiritual perspective.