This was my first time i read the cards for someone else other than me.

It was past midnight, we were in Quirino, a region the far flung northern mountains of Luzon, for my folk dance and music group’s performance tour, and with the lead of one of our oldest tour members – we were getting thoroughly drunk by the poolside.

I MUST BE HONEST. I found him attractive, tall, moreno principal dancer from filipiniana dance group, doing dance research on headhunter tribes – what’s not to love?

Anywho, one of my friends from KG(abbreviation of our long ass troupe name Kontemporaryong Gamelan Pilipino) has a special way of doing divination with playing cards! And I was thoroughly intrigued. She was doing it one the rest of the KG people, it was really fun. I was helping her read the spread with a few guesses, but found myself itching for my phone.


For those who are unfamiliar, Iching is an ancient chinese divinatory system, and yeah there’s an app for it, and yeah those digital ones work as well as physical decks, it just depends on the reader and the power of intent. Anyway,


His spread showed a complicated, filled-with-baggage love life, a whole bunch of cards lined up on the ace of hearts card and I pulled up an iching hexagram about it.


If this was western tarot- this would be the death card. I felt how much raw panic he felt over the situation of his past love leaving him and confusing him and the heavy axe of the decision and I ended up blurting out:


“what did you learn about yourself from the experience? sudden pain in life, teaches you about you”

And the whole group of surrounded drunks by the poolside did a collective ‘ooooOOOoSFOOOOOOFooooooh’ all around (let’s call just him) kuya Jo, who’s now put on the spot, scrambling to answer, he was all like ‘what do you mean?’ hah? ANO

You see deliverance talks about the clearing of the air after a storm, when the thunder strikes and the air is fizzling. their’s a clarity their from the jolted panic, a heightened awareness.

“what did you become after?”

The crowd around us murmered, kuya Jo thought about it. He said something akin to him not being proudd of his indecision and how he’s admitting now that he’s still full with regret for not following her, or not having begged her to stay harder. He has a barcode tattoo on his side of the plate number of the car they used to share. I sympathized, and lead him gently.

“did you become stronger?”

He had a long winding answer of ‘maybe’, and I do feel like he struggled with reframing his experience to something positive. Instead he circled back to his initial question about his new love interest. I drew a card, it was hexagram 1 creative power changing to small influences.

My partner in crime fellow reader told him to just chill and make sure he let go of his past love. Then i told him that i got the most auspicious card in the iching but he has to be SUBTLE AF. (he is not subtle, he proceeds to dance around about being subtle after the statement) but is otherwise delighted.


I felt invigorated! the guidance that i receive and trust from the iching has helped me a lot and here i am being ALL OCCULT IN THE MOUNTAINS, for the first time and the #frustratedtarot reader feels is too real. Well we be living in a traditional catholic country. But regardless, i rode the rest of the energies, reading for everyone else. I was bloody accurate with my partner in crime and I had a smile crawl up on my face.

The messages are so clear- wow i can actually do this! I remember a time when i used to have some fear? lowkey awe from manghuhulas, intuitive readers, energy healers the whole new age gamut and whatnot- but me doing this consistently and with persistence has brought me to a point where I can get the courage to do this drunk.

a really strong card too, DELIVERANCE.




I’ve been trying to pick up tarot now, finally having found an app with multiple decks and with art that SPEAKS to me and i kind of get. Me having increased my intuition via iching has also helped loads with trying to figure out messages.. and what i’ve been getting a lot are Death cards, a few towers…



I’m realizing a lot of things about myself. Have been digging deep about my nature and seeing how I’ve incarnated with my family and how they’re the perfect fit to teach me about things (and me to consequently teach them!) -but I’ve been chickening out. And it’s funny when you’ve got a good, inner guide connection, it’s loud and clear-

is exactly when you don’t WANT to do it. (OH GEESSDGFDSHAHA) #HIRAP.

But death is rebirth, the same way that deliverance is a rebirth of clarity.

a clearing of the air.


So we should be rethinking our attitudes behind these cards, and finally wield their true power.


tell me your death card experiences in the comments,

Love, Maālia


PS: apps are visionary iching and tarot sampler, 5 our of 5 stars highly recommend 🙂






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